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Time for separate beds? People who co-sleep wake each other up SIX times a night on average, study reveals

by LJ News Opinions
March 18, 2026
in Technology
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It can be lovely to have a cuddle before bed – but people who co-sleep wake each other up six times a night on average, according to a study.

Experts have found that when someone tugs at the covers, rolls over or kicks out a leg during the night, it can have a profound effect on the person they are sleeping next to.

While these disturbances are often brief and forgotten by the morning, they could be impacting your shut-eye more than you realise.

The findings come amid a growing trend that’s been dubbed ‘sleep divorce’. 

As the name suggests, this sees couples sleep in separate bedrooms to maximise their shut-eye.

While this might sound like a slippery slope to a full-blown divorce, Laura Boubert, principal lecturer in psychology at the University of Westminster, claims it can actually be beneficial.

‘Separate sleeping arrangements allow each person to optimise their own sleep environment,’ she wrote on The Conversation.

‘This might include choosing different mattresses or bedding, adjusting light levels, controlling room temperature, or even changing scents and air quality in the bedroom.’

This graph shows how often a waking episode caused the other partner to wake up throughout the night

People have called for sleeping in separate beds in a relationship to be 'normalised'
It comes amid a growing ‘sleep divorce’ trend, that sees couples sleep in separate bedrooms to maximise their shut-eye

People have called for sleeping in separate beds in a relationship to be ‘normalised’. It comes amid a growing ‘sleep divorce’ trend, that sees couples sleep in separate bedrooms to maximise their shut-eye

For the study, researchers from Queensland University of Technology in Australia analysed 18 previous sleep studies.

One of the studies asked couples to wear movement–detecting smartwatches while they slept in their shared bed at home.

On average, the participants were woken six times per night by their partner’s movements.

‘Research finds that subjectively, people think they sleep better together than when they sleep apart, but when you objectively measure it, there’s more sleep disruption when they sleep together,’ Sean Drummond, from Monash University in Melbourne, told New Scientist.

Another paper included in the review found that up to 46 per cent of couples’ movements are shared, meaning that when one person moves the other one does too.

One study in a sleep lab, for example, recorded an average of 51 leg movements per night in individuals when they slept alone but 62 when they slept with their partner.

‘Overall, there is agreement that partner disturbance is a common phenomenon that is shown in sharing of movements,’ the researchers wrote in the journal Sleep Health.

The review also found that major sleep disturbances are more likely to emerge when one partner snores or has insomnia.

Experts have found that when someone tugs at the covers, rolls over or kicks out a leg during the night, it can have a profound effect on the person they are sleeping next to (file image)

Experts have found that when someone tugs at the covers, rolls over or kicks out a leg during the night, it can have a profound effect on the person they are sleeping next to (file image)

However, one benefit of sharing a bed was that these participants appeared to experience more dream–like REM sleep – possibly due to the increased security felt when lying next to a partner. 

Sleeping apart can support better sleep hygiene, Ms Boubert explained.

‘Each partner can adapt their habits around their own sleep patterns, such as going to bed at different times, reading before sleep, or avoiding screens in bed,’ she said.

‘This behaviour is known to promote better sleep and, in turn, better overall health.’

Although sleeping in separate beds is sometimes seen as a sign of relationship trouble, this is ‘not necessarily the case’.

‘If a partner’s behaviour is consistently disrupting sleep, the health benefits of sleeping separately may outweigh the drawbacks,’ she added.

‘For some couples, sharing a bed strengthens connection and comfort.

‘For others, a “sleep divorce” may simply be a practical way to ensure everyone gets the rest they need.’

Actress Cameron Diaz has advocated for the practice, saying: ‘We should normalise separate bedrooms.’

Earlier this week, a poll of 2,000 recently divorced Britons found snoring is a factor in nearly half of break–ups.

Some 47 per cent of divorcees said their partner’s night-time snorting contributed to their marriage breakdown.

Dr Sonia Szamocki, of the healthcare firms 32Co and Aerox Health, which conducted the poll, said snoring was no joking matter, but was ‘undermining the very fabric of relationships’.

Experts have warned that when partners are forced into separate bedrooms, they lose the critical ‘pillow talk’ and spontaneous physical closeness that anchor a relationship.

HOW TO COPE WITH SLEEP PROBLEMS

Poor sleep can lead to worrying and worrying can lead to poor sleep, according to the mental-health charity Mind.

A lack of shut eye is considered a problem when it impacts on a person’s daily life.

As a result, they may feel anxious if they believe lack of sleep prevents them from rationalising their thoughts.

Insomnia is also associated with depression, psychosis and PTSD.

Establishing a sleep routine where you go to bed and get up at the same time every day can help a person spend less time in bed and more time asleep.

Calming music, breathing exercises, visualising pleasant memories and meditation also encourage shut eye. 

Having tech-free time an hour or so before bed can also prepare you for sleep. 

If you still struggle to nod off, keeping a sleep diary where you record the hours you spend asleep and the quality of your shut eye on a scale of one to five can be a good thing to show your doctor.

Also note how many times you wake in the night, if you need to nap, if you have nightmares, your diet and your general mood.

Sleep problems can be a sign of an underlying physical condition, like pain.

Talking therapies can help your recongise unhelpful thought patterns that might affect sleep.

While medication, such as sleeping pills, can help break short periods of insomnia and help you return to better a sleeping pattern. 

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