When organizers for the Payne family vigil asked the press whether they had any further questions, they almost missed the tiny girl who raised her hand.
Carrying a stuffie vigil organizers Circle of Love handed out to the more than 40 kids who came out to honor the Paynes — mom Briana, 27; and daughters Aurorah, 7, Ava, 6, and Alayna, 4, who were discovered on Feb. 21 after having been fatally shot in an apparent murder-suicide – at Bailey Elementary School in Lake Station Friday evening, the little girl told the crowd her name was Samantha. She didn’t have a question, though.
“I miss the three of them so much,” Samantha said before her face fell. “They are in my heart.”
Samantha’s bravery opened the floodgates among the students, all of them still reeling from a week of trying to understand what happened to their friends. Adults — teachers, administrators, counselors for every classroom — were on hand to try to explain the unfathomable, but it’s sometimes hard telling how much a child grasps when family violence taking someone away is thrown at their feet.
Friday night, they wanted to talk about it.
“My name is Zoe Dempsey, and she was my best friend,” another student said of Aurorah who, it became clear, had many best friends. “The last time I saw her, she was running to give her mom a hug, and I didn’t get to say ‘Hi’ to her. I really miss her.”
Sylas Clark, an older boy, got to know the Paynes through his sister, Rylee, who was another one of Aurorah’s besties. He hoped God had let them into Heaven.
“They were more than friends – they were family,” Sylas said, his voice cracking. “Bri was so kind to everyone else. They didn’t deserve this.”
The Paynes used to take Rylee Clark all over the place, she told the crowd.
“The first time (they) took me somewhere was to the beach, and it was so fun,” Rylee said before bursting into tears. “I want to give her one more hug.”
Sheela Djordjevich, Rylee’s and Sylas’s mom, said she keeps finding little trinkets that middle child Ava would give her to put in her car. She was grateful the children got a chance to talk.
“I’m really surprised Rylee got up there,” Djordevich said. “Sylas is emotional, so that didn’t surprise me, but Rylee said she didn’t want to talk about it. I’m glad she did.”
Lili Parker Owens, Briana Payne’s mother and the girls’ grandmother, said she’s starting to see the tiniest flicker of light in the world again. The community’s overwhelming support has been instrumental in that, she said.
While she may not be at the point where she can forgive Robert Payne for what he did just yet, her heart still breaks for his pain.
“Robert loved his family — so much so that he couldn’t bear to not have them around,” Parker Owens told the crowd. “Mental health is so important, so please be aware of it in yourself and others. Get help, get them help.”
Parker Owens said later that a talk with someone in the Lake County Coroner’s office allayed her fears of what happened that night her son-in-law killed his family. She’d been terrified that he’d acted out of malice.
“Based on what they told me, it wasn’t hatred for my daughter: It was fear and shame. I know he loved his family,” Parker Owens said. “We all tried to help him. I begged him to talk to someone — a counselor, a pastor, his brother even – but he always said, ‘Talking’s not going to help.’ Well, that’s because you never did.”
Briana’s father, Michael Cobbs, thanked the 100 or so people who came out to honor his family. He moved one of his and Parker Owens’s other daughters, Leilani, and her newborn to Gary this week to stay with Parker Owens for a while.
“I like looking at the laughter and joy, and looking at these little ones here, this is our tomorrow,” he said. “Whatever we introduce them to now is what they’re going to learn. Actions speak louder than words.”
Lake Station Mayor Bill Carroll thanked everyone for coming out and apologized for the pain that came from the family’s death. Bailey Elementary Principal Kim Hayes marveled at all of the support.
“It’s like nothing I’ve ever seen,” she said. “The PTA put together angel wings in their memory that we’re going to keep in the office, and the (Lake Station) Police Department is supposed to get us a plaque for the school.
“We’re going to keep honoring them. They’ll always be in our hearts and memories.”
Hayes said she’ll always remember how different Aurorah and Ava were, and how little Alayna wanted to do everything her big sisters did. Aurorah “loved every part of her life” and let people know it, while Ava’s “quiet sweetness” always saw her pause before giving her heart away, Hayes said.
Hayes’s favorite memory of the family is one that happened mere days before the tragedy: Briana Payne and her daughters at the Valentine’s Dance.
“The four of them were dancing together. That will forever remind us of the love they shared,” Hayes said.
Michelle L. Quinn is a freelance reporter for the Post-Tribune.
